Drunken Air Skiing
by saxwarrior
Summary: After passing their Auror examinations, Harry and Ron decide to celebrate. However, starting their careers brings the reality of adulthood closer than either of them realized. So, the two decide to have one last night of fun. Rated T for drunkenness.


A/N: I've been reading a lot of fanfictions lately that are really unfavorable of Ron. The reasons for this are obvious; Ron abandoned Harry during the two most trying times of his life. However, the idiots who say Ron's a bad friend are overlooking the single most important fact about those two incidents; Ron. Came. Back. And people will still be determined to hate him. "Oh, he may have come back, but he left in the first place and that's simply unforgivable." I think those people are missing the moral of Harry Potter; love conquers all. It was because of Ron's love for his friends that he knew, probably from the start, that Harry hadn't entered the Triwizard Tournament on his own and it's why he went back to Harry and Hermione during the Horcrux hunt. The point is, only twice throughout the seven years of Harry's and Ron's friendship that we see do the two have a falling out and both times, Harry forgives Ron and they end up closer than ever. That's true friendship, and anyone who says that Ron's a bad friend is just making an ass out of themselves.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

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"I reckon..."

Ron stopped midsentence, his eyes glazing over. He was leaning forward on a wooden chair, looking as if it took him a great effort to do his reckoning.

Harry was lying on his back on the sofa with his eyes closed, but he heard Ron stop talking.

"Ron?"

Ron took another large swig of Firewhiskey and thought as hard as his inebriated mind would allow. "I reckon... I reckon... I RECKON... I reckon, I reckon... I reckonIreckonIreckonIreckon..."

"Reckon, what?" asked Harry, his equally inebriated mind hurting with Ron's repetition of the two words.

"I reckon!" said Ron pointedly, "I reckon we were given our Auror exams early because... because we're us!"

Harry smiled drunkenly, still not looking up. The two friends were alone in the Burrow. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley were at a Ministry dinner party, Ginny was attending her final year at Hogwarts and Hermione was working late.

"You mean..." said Harry, "we're Aurors because we're famous?"

"Sure, mate, I mean look at what we've done."

Ron sat up a little straighter, or tried to anyway. "We stopped Voldymor from getting the Philsophies stone..." It was then that Harry realized how much Ron was slurring his words. "We solved the mistery of the Chammer of Seeecrits... we dooled with Deth Eters in the Deparmen of Misteries... and we destroyed all Voldymor's Hocruzes."

Harry nodded, a feat easier said than done when you're horizontal and drunk. "Yeah, mate... We're awesome... we did a whole buncha stuff that nooooobody(!) would ever do... and it's because..."

Harry stopped there, evidently forgetting where he was going with that.

"Because?"

"Because... because... because because because because BECAUSE!" Harry sang. "Because of the wonderful things he does!"

"Huh?" asked Ron.

"Wizard of Oz," said Harry. "Isa movie."

"Wha?"

"A film!"

"Wha?"

"You know, a Muggle moving picture."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Anyway, because of why?"

"Because," said Harry, forcing himself into a seated position and looking at Ron intimately. "Because I'm the Chosen One who won't freaking die and you're the ginger who tags along and saves his ass!"

Ron laughed drunkenly. "I geddit. It's cause you're 'the boy who lived' but you changed it to 'the boy who won't freaking die." He continued to laugh.

"You must not be very drunk if you could've figured that out," said Harry.

"Yeah, well... the point is we're Aurors now because we're amazing."

"We're not Aurors yet," Harry reminded him. "We start tomorrow."

"Yeah," said Ron slowly.

"But it's a bit of a bummer, isn't it?" asked Harry. "I mean, I know it's great and all, but now we've got to live by the Auror's code, don't we? We'll have all these rules and guidelines we have to follow or we'll get fired."

"Rules," said Ron reminiscently. "I miss rules. They were fun to break."

"We can still break rules," said Harry. "We're amazing, remember?"

"Right," said Ron, suddenly excited. "What rule should we break?"

"I have an idea," said Harry, "but I'm not sure if it's good enough."

"What is it?"

Harry fought through his drunkenness to remember what his idea had been.

"You remember that Christmas Hermione went skiing?"

Ron, who remembered nothing of the sort due to his rapidly deteriorating brain functions said, "Of course."

"Well, she went snow skiing," said Harry, "and there's also water skiing... but I think, for us two, as amazing as we are, we should be the first to try... AIR SKIING."

Ron still looked confused.

"Come with me!" said Harry, standing and wobbling a little as he tried to lead an equally unsteady Ron to Mr. Weasley's garden shed. Once inside, Harry pulled out a piece of equipment that Mr. Weasley kept hidden under a tarp.

Ron observed it through his unfocused eyes and asked "Isn't that?"

"Sirius's old motorcycle, yeah," said Harry. He wheeled it outside, then went back inside the house. Ron was left to observe the old motorcycle. After a minute, Harry returned with a broomstick.

"I had to get a new Firebolt since I lost my old one leaving Privet Drive."

"What are you going to do?" asked Ron.

"Watch closely," said Harry, and waving his wand, he conjured a rope that binded the front of the broomstick handle to the back of the motorcycle.

"Air skiing," said Harry.

Ron's drunk mind cottoned on. "Oh, I see."

Harry hitched a leg over the broom and Ron hopped on the motorcycle (almost literally). Ron kickstarted it and its engine rumbled to life. "Ok, go!" Harry shouted, but Ron was already going fast.

Ron zoomed this way and that around the yard, getting the momentum necessary until he finally lifted the bike into the air. Harry whooped loudly from the broomstick trailing behind the bike. The motorcycle was flying faster even than his Firebolt could go. They were ascending higher and higher until Harry started getting wet from the clouds they flew through.

"This is awesome!" Harry shouted over the roar of the bike.

"I know!" Ron shouted, looking over his shoulder and grinning broadly. When he turned back around though, his eyes widened to match the widened eyes of the biplane pilot looking right back at him.

"AUGGGGHHHH!" Ron screamed and he twisted the bike into a sharp right turn. This left Harry swinging to the far left, which inconveniently was the direction the biplane had banked to avoid the flying motorcycle. Harry only just managed to bring his broom under control to send it flying over the wing that would've otherwise struck him out of the sky. However, in getting so close to the airplane, Harry was blown over the broomstick handle and found himself falling downward.

"Ron!" Harry shouted, but he realized Ron was falling, too. In his attempt to turn a sharp right, Ron had turned the motorcycle on its side so he was now falling from the great height with the motorcycle above him. They two propelled themselves toward each other and held on like falling sky divers.

"I never thought I'd die drunk!" Ron screamed, tears streaming across his face.

"Me neither!" Harry said. "Let's sober ourselves up and face our deaths like sober men!"

They each drew their wands and pointed it at the other's face and said, "Sobrietus!" Instantly, they returned to their normal selves. Then, Ron shouted, "Harry!"

"What?"

"We're bloody wizards! What are we doing falling like this?"

Ashamed Harry realized what Ron was saying. Pointing his wand at Ron again, he said "Wingardium Leviosa!" just as Ron did the same, and now they were both hovering, still a hundred or so feet above the ground.

They slowly lowered themselves and landed on a grassy outcropping. Harry's broomstick and the motorbike were not far away. Both looked the worse for wear.

"I think," Ron breathed heavily, "that I've just been turned off by alcohol forever."

"Not forever," said Harry, his eyes wide and his hair a mess. "That was the most fun I've had since leaving Hogwarts."

"We're Aurors now, Harry," said Ron. "We've got to be more mature and responsible."

"You be mature and responsible!" said Harry, mending his broken broomstick. "I'm going to catch up to that plane and see if I can air ski from it!"

...

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Short one shot. I love stories about best friends. And I still think Ron's a good friend.


End file.
